I’ve been meaning to write this post all week, but today is the first day I found time to write. I could be cleaning, showering, napping, etc. right now during these precious 30 minutes of nap time, but I choose to clear my head!
There is so much to say regarding this topic, and I know the list will only continue to grow and grow as parenthood is like a long term college course that you must retake each year. However, as Sadie’s 4 month birthday is approaching, I think back about how much I have learned about becoming a first time mom and thought I would share. Again, this is just my thoughts and opinions, and I realize that it’s different for everyone so….no judging 😉
1. There will be a lot of crying…from you and the little one. Holy moly, can you say waterworks?! During the first couple weeks, I cried a couple of times everyday. The emotional roller coaster you are on from delivery onwards is crazy. I mean every little thing made me cry, but at least I kinda knew why I was crying, poor Sadie. She was just trying to figure out the world around her, and I thought it would be much easier for the little nugget than it was. It seemed like if she wasn’t eating or sleeping, she was just crying. I thought I had the unhappiest baby. I knew crying was going to be part of the deal but I had noooo idea it would be that much. There were days when Michael would come home and he would open the door to two crying babies. Then, I would go on other blogs, Facebook, Instagram(#bigmistake), and see all my friends with their babies and just say, “Their baby doesn’t look like they cry a lot.” But, let’s all be honest, who really posts pictures of crying babies and themselves in pjs with no make up on looking a hot mess. Phew, I am glad those days are over and we are a much more happier bunch 🙂
2. You’ll have a love/hate relationship with Google. Michael would always know when I was researching something that I shouldn’t have been and would jokingly ask if he “had to take the iPad away.” Most days, my answer to that should have been yes! I am a little better now, but I would google EVERYTHING! Why does my baby cry so much? How much should my baby be eating? How much should my baby be sleeping? When to transition to crib? Are hiccups this normal? Gassy baby? Etc. Etc. Etc. I saw in another post a mom that even googled “Newborn who hates life.” This made me laugh so hard because I know at one point I am sure I googled this but worded it a little differently. Oh yeah, I almost forgot the worst part, where I would “diagnose” Sadie with colic and acid reflux, (which she had neither) But when you read all these articles and posts from other moms listing the symptoms, you start to believe it.
Then, there were/are days where it’s comforting going online and finding that you are not the only one going through all these crazy times. So, Google, I love and hate you, but I will not take your medical advice…I’ll leave that to the pediatrician.
3. Your baby is an incredibly noisy sleeper. You can read more of my thoughts on this in a previous post about sleeping, but….geesh! Who knew something so tiny and cute could be capable of making such horrendous noises while sleeping? There were nights of grunting, gurgling, choking, spitting, crying out, all while our precious sleeping beauty slept next to us in our bed. That lasted about a week when Michael and I pushed our little bundle of joy in her little bed to her own room. Don’t get me wrong, there are still plenty of nights where I can hear her from our room. Then, when I stumble into her bedroom thinking to find a wide awake baby, I instead find a sleeping cutie who just happens to sound a grown man snoring or a baby who was having the worst nightmare 😦 And don’t worry, I googled “noisy sleeping baby,” and it’s normal.
P.S. I am a little nervous about going home for Christmas and having to share a room with her again. Probably will have to drink an extra glass of wine or two to get through those nights 🙂
4. Your body will look different. I know this is a touchy subject for some, and I try not to dwell on the numbers I see on the scale, but I’m human and I have insecurities. I was lucky enough in that most of the weight came off within the first couple of weeks on it’s own. I think this was caused by the constant anxiety and upset stomach I gave myself about now having this precious life to care for. My appetite was completely different and took about two weeks to feel normal again. However, for the last 3 months, my weight has stayed exactly the same. There are 6 pesky pounds that won’t go away. I know I know, you say 6 pounds, who cares? I’ve said that too! But when I get a good look at myself after getting out of the shower, I know exactly where those 6 pounds are…my stomach! My body has taken on a slightly new shape and I wonder if it’s here to stay. I wonder if it will always bother me and if anyone else notices. My body is a little softer, my hips are wider, and my boobs are way smaller than they were before I was pregnant. Clothes fit differently and for right now, as much as I want to go out and buy a whole new wardrobe in hopes to give myself that little boost in self-esteem, it’s not important. What is important is that I am healthy, both mind and body, and that Michael and Sadie are healthy and happy.
5. Your baby will be freakishly strong. This just makes me giggle and may seem totally insignificant. However, be prepared to lose wads and wads of hair! I plead and beg with Sadie on a daily basis, “Please let go of Mommy’s hair…Mommy doesn’t look cute with short hair!” I just don’t want to cut it, but she is making it so tempting. Even when it’s in a ponytail, she will grab the part that’s pulled up, which hurts even more! And that’s just her tiny little grip. Don’t get my started on her head butting. She has given me red marks on my forehead and a blood blister on my bottom lip from her cute little round head. I think she’s going in a for a nice snuggle and WHAM, I take one to the head and she’s totally unfazed by it all as I wince and bite my lip trying not to swear. Somedays, I think I need a helmet.
6. Ask for help. This is huge! As much as I want to be SuperMom, I need help, simple as that. I think Michael and I are a super parent duo but outside help from family and friends is great. I remember when my parents came out to visit for a night during the week, and I went to the grocery store by myself. I just thought it was the most magnificent thing in the world. I rushed through in the grocery store in record timing because I felt terrible being away from her, but it was nice. Don’t get me wrong, I love her dearly, but there are things that are just that much easier to do without a baby in tow and also you need some alone time every once in a while. It does take a village to raise a child. If you are lucky enough to have loving family and friends close by, consider yourself to be blessed.
I know I could go on and on and will probably add to this list fairly soon, but I think it’s a good start. I think if I would have told myself this while pregnant, I would have laughed. You take all kinds of advice and tips while you are pregnant, but you fully don’t understand it until it’s game on and there’s a child looking up at you. Becoming a mom is the most wonderful and amazing gift and challenge I have ever received. What an extremely lucky lady I am for being blessed with with such an amazing husband and daughter.